Tuesday, July 23, 2024

Offsite Post: ‘The Bill Cassidy Comedy Tour’

 

Coming soon to a Louisiana city or media outlet near you, the hilarious hijinx of US Senator Bill Cassidy!  Bring the whole family to experience all the knee-slappers and side-splitters that are the hallmark of Illinois Bill!

And since we’ve heard from so many of you folks clamoring for a preview – ‘Don’t be stingy, lay some of those hee-haws on us now!’ – well, we’re so excited about our man we’re happy to comply!

Here’s the set-up on fiscal responsibility:


U-S Senator Bill Cassidy is once again not seeing eye-to-eye with Governor Jeff Landry as the senior senator opposes the idea of sending Louisiana National Guard troops to the U-S-Mexico border. Cassidy has concerns about the projected cost to the state…

 

“The Advocate reported it might cost as much as three million dollars and if you add that to the $135 million we’re going to spend on closed primaries that’s a lot of money for a state like Louisiana.”

And here’s the punchline:


As I travel across Louisiana, nearly every community has desperate infrastructure needs. Congress came together to put forward a historic investment in our nation’s roads, bridges, waterways, and online infrastructure. The Infrastructure Investment and Jobs Act (IIJA) is the largest investment in infrastructure and coastal resiliency in the history of our state.

 

 . . . The law is $550 billion of new infrastructure spending, combined with regular, baseline annual spending.

 

 . . . received the single largest award in the entire country at $600 million to build a Direct Air Capture hub in Southwest Louisiana

For the price of one boondoggle carbon capture project, Louisiana could fund the Louisiana Guard at the Texas border and closed primaries four times over.  Good one Bill!

Here’s ol’ Bill winding up on Pres. Trump and Jan. 6:


Cassidy said he voted to convict Trump “because he is guilty.” In a follow-up letter sent to newspapers around Louisiana, Cassidy acknowledged the vote would draw complaint.

 

“I have no illusions that this is a popular decision. I made this decision because Americans should not be fed lies about ‘massive election fraud.’ Police should not be left to the mercy of a mob. Mobs should not be inflamed to disrupt the peaceful transfer of power,” Cassidy wrote. “I took an oath to support and defend the Constitution.”

And here comes the finish:


Republican Congressman Clay Higgins issued a warning to FBI officials investigating the Capitol Riots, saying that they are "going down."

 

More than 1,100 Americans have been charged for their alleged roles in the Jan. 6 riot, which took place in 2021 when a group of former President Donald Trump's supporters violently protested the 2020 presidential election results.

 

Higgins, a Louisiana Republican, has been a vocal proponent of the theory that federal agencies planted people at the scene and provoked the riot as an excuse to arrest conservatives.

 

Speaking to Lara Logan, a former CBS News correspondent turned right-wing commentator, Higgins, a former law enforcement officer himself, advanced his theories, claiming the FBI is tracking Trump supporters who were in Washington over the days leading up to the Capitol Riots and treated as suspected terrorists. He said those on a supposed list are still tracked by air marshals to this day despite not being convicted of crimes.

And the flourish:


Republican Rep. Clay Higgins accused the FBI of having a “ghost bus” of informants impersonating pro-Trump supporters during the Jan. 6, 2021, attack in Washington, D.C.

 

The remarks were made at a Homeland Security Committee hearing on Wednesday, Nov. 15. Clay drilled FBI Director Christopher Wray on whether the agency was involved in the insurrection — where the angry mob stormed the U.S. Capitol in an attempt to overturn the 2020 presidential election results.

 

 . . . “Can you confirm that the FBI had confidential human sources at the ‘Stop the Steal’ rally on January 6 here in D.C., sir?” Higgins asked.

 

“Congressman, as we’ve discussed before, I’m not going to get into where we have or have not used confidential human sources,” Wray responded.

Audiences always enjoy a comedic duo.  Nice work fellas!

And of course you will hear plenty of old classics, like these great lines about the freedom of the press in the Ukraine:

 . . .

The rest is at https://thehayride.com/2024/02/garlington-the-bill-cassidy-comedy-tour/.

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Holy Ælfred the Great, King of England, South Patron, pray for us sinners at the Souð, unworthy though we are!

Anathema to the Union!

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